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Chuck Norris


Every one has heard one of his jokes at least once. Aperantly this has started online when one kid decided to start a list of Chuck Norris facts, it soon caught on and now there are a ton of jokes, books, and some youtube videos.

What i wanna see is the best ones that you can find or even some you have come up with.

to start here is one that i thought was funny:

Teenage mutant turtles was based off a true story, Chuck Norris swallowed a turtle and when it came out it was 6 feet tall and had learned Karita.

Here is one that i found in a youtube comment:

Chuck Norris eats VHSs and poops DVDs.
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 11/1/2010, 11:00 pm
Chuck norris once visited the virgin islands
they are now called the islands
GeMinEye Re: Chuck Norris on 15/1/2010, 3:39 pm
hand sanitizer kills 99.9% germs

Chuck Norris kills 100.0% germs
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 15/1/2010, 4:28 pm

HAHA! awesome someone made a Magic Card for Chuck!

mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 16/1/2010, 2:02 am
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 16/1/2010, 11:56 am
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 16/1/2010, 3:13 pm
When taking the SAT, write !Chuck Norris ! every answer. You will score over 8000
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 16/1/2010, 5:17 pm
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 16/1/2010, 8:00 pm
hah! this thread is nothing but laughs guys ^,^

I found another Magic Card for Chuck!
(red and black ~ that's my flavor)

GeMinEye Re: Chuck Norris on 16/1/2010, 11:32 pm
if Chuck Norris was put in a video game, and did a round house kick on a bad guy, the TV would explode!!
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 17/1/2010, 7:46 pm
Jesus can walk on water, but only Chuck Norris can swim through land.
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 24/1/2010, 12:04 am
When Chuck Norris goes into water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet, the water get's Chuck Norris.

There is no "ctrl" key on Chuck Norris's keyboard, Chuck Norris is always in control.

Chuck Norris isn't afraid of the dark, the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris once killed 2 stones with 1 bird.

When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn't push up, he pushes the world down.
snowghost20 Re: Chuck Norris on 24/1/2010, 8:15 pm

BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 24/1/2010, 9:55 pm
If Mr. T and Chuck Norris walked into a bar, it would explode instantly. No place can hold that amount of awesomeness.
GeMinEye Re: Chuck Norris on 24/1/2010, 11:08 pm
I am surprised that just the mentioning of Chuck Norris has not exploded our site. Very Happy
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 24/1/2010, 11:53 pm
Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.            
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 6/2/2010, 3:07 am
One day Chuck was hungry and wanted a Whopper.
He carelessly walked into a McDonald's and left with a Whopper.
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 6/2/2010, 3:54 am
Chuck Norris is the only man who can win the game.
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 6/2/2010, 5:13 am
That's actually not true
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 6/2/2010, 8:20 am
uh oh Blue - Chuck Norris is giving you a dirty look. Mad
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 6/2/2010, 7:02 pm
Then he dies
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 6/2/2010, 11:19 pm
no then blue gets round house kicked, and then blue dies.
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 12:13 am
The ninja in our blood spills over his leg and eats away at it like acid. It spreads throughout Chuck's blood stream and kills him too...
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 12:24 am
Chuck Norris' blood is MADE of acid blue.
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 12:44 am
.....I have ninja powers!!!!
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 1:04 am
Unless you forgotten Blue Bruce Lee is the only one that is allowed to kill Chuck Norris on film. In short, Blue, everyone looses in the end.
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 1:05 am
Yeah, Bruce Lee was awesome, poor guy though, dying that young....
P.S: Like my new Ninja colour?
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 1:09 am
yeah who would of poisoned him though...
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 1:10 am
Yeah, though I think that it was an accident
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 2:06 am
not according to Chuck (and I'm a die hard Bruce Lee fanatic)
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 2:07 am
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 2:20 am
yeah Chuck is soo evil the devil agreed to Chuck's deal. Evil or Very Mad
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 7/2/2010, 3:13 am
I was talking about the person that poisoned Bruce Lee
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 8/2/2010, 5:56 am
HA! - just caught that ^,^

well Chuck's so bad @$$ that he chose to have red hair.
however you address him, Mr.Norris, Chucky, just don't call him "ginger balls!"
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 8/2/2010, 11:26 pm
dont call me that either
GeMinEye Re: Chuck Norris on 9/2/2010, 12:06 am
you have red hair daffy, Question gameface
Dafralanatah Re: Chuck Norris on 9/2/2010, 1:17 am
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 9/2/2010, 1:59 am
ha! no worries daf ~ we no better to "F" with you or Chuck.

Chuck was once bitten by a cobra... it took 4 days of excruciating
pain for the Cobra to die.
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 17/2/2010, 5:49 am
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 20/2/2010, 3:52 am
@wiggles - ha! such a great link!

Chuck is so bad @$$ that he played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won!
GeMinEye Re: Chuck Norris on 20/2/2010, 3:17 pm
Chuck blinded the ladies with his rock hard abs.
Eriol Clowphengire Re: Chuck Norris on 25/2/2010, 10:16 am
Chuck Norris, he rides on Masked Riders XD
snowghost20 Re: Chuck Norris on 25/2/2010, 10:09 pm
This is just like Kung Pow. Except He is fighting a dog!

mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 8/3/2010, 1:33 am
Chuck Norris beard leaves each night to terrorize Alaska as big foot, only to return in the morning.
GeMinEye Re: Chuck Norris on 11/3/2010, 10:47 am
Chuck Norris is the only person to count to infinity...................twice. Razz
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 13/3/2010, 3:43 pm
Chuck is such a bad @$$....

Learn more at the Gaming Wiki
mr_wiggles Re: Chuck Norris on 14/3/2010, 1:38 am
^ wondering if that will be an actual game some day.
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 14/3/2010, 2:11 am
probably, not by a company though. maybe some guy on a forum. It's funny how he destroys everything
G@MeF@Ce Re: Chuck Norris on 24/3/2011, 2:33 am
Chuck Norris doesn't pay attention - attention pays him, or else...
BluE Re: Chuck Norris on 24/3/2011, 4:14 am
When Chuck Norris uses a Macbook, it becomes a pear.

Terrible I know.
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